The Illusion of Good Fruit

“This is my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.”

John 15:8

I considered the good fruit my fiancé produced, his Christ-like lifestyle, and his goals that aligned with mine to be a confirmation of our marriage plans. After the marriage, the shift occurred gradually as the fruit of his Christian life shriveled, one fruit at a time. Confusing behaviors took their place; behaviors he refused to discuss with me.

Jim Denison’s statement on biblical fruit helped capture the painful reality of what I

witnessed: “Such living evidence is proof of who we really are in our souls*" (Emphasis

mine).

I eventually accepted that what appeared as good fruit were, in truth, strategic

behaviors for drawing me into the relationship. Even the godly behaviors others

observed served the purpose of attracting narcissistic supply. When the attention

dwindled, so did the spiritual actions.

Such a painful realization shattered my heart and challenged me to accept two realities:

1) accept that I had misjudged his character 2) accept that I had been intentionally

deceived. Healing required bringing my shame, embarrassment, and other self-

incriminating thoughts to the Lord and resting in His timing for His love to bring me to a

renewed identity in Him.

Thank you, Father, for your healing gift of grief. Carry my heart gently in your loving

hands as I grieve the past illusions of godliness and I accept today’s reality. I yield my

life and ask You to produce eternal fruit for Your glory and for Your Kingdom. In Your

Son’s name I pray, amen.

*Jim Denison, Matthew, A Guide to Genuine Discipleship, (DenisonForum.org/store,

2024, Denison Ministries).

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