Finding My Way

You provide a broad path for my feet, so that my ankles do not give way.

Psalm 18:36

On sunny days, I enjoy observing bird antics from my porch. The doves especially intrigue me. While other birds zoom directly to their favorite food source, doves land away from the feeders then cautiously wind their way through tuffs of grass to peck at loose seeds on the ground.

I totally identify with the dove’s zig-zagging course and apparent willingness to settle for leftovers. My experience of narcissistic abuse resulted in a similar loss of confidence in my point of view. I also lost confidence in identifying and asking for what I needed in the relationship—a very different perspective from David, my favorite biblical character.  

King David confidently acknowledged God’s guidance and praised Him for the ways He worked to bring him victory in leadership and in battle: “You provide a broad path for my feet, so that my ankles do not give way” (Ps. 18:36).

I, too, recount ways God broadened my path during the earliest days of my zig-zagging path forward toward emotional health: information, wise counsel, housing, and support from understanding friends. Yet, even with these resources, I still must resist the temptation to cautiously tiptoe around obstacles, to question my decisions, and to settle for whatever works out.

I am thankful for God’s broadening path as He equips me to clearly ask for what I need, to make confident decisions, and to expect more than leftovers. Also, like King David, I look forward to eventually composing a poem of praise that identifies ways God continues to strengthen and provide for me each step of this narrow way.

Father, thank You for quiet moments for reflection. During those times I see my struggles as well as Your tender hand of care and provision more clearly. I desire a heart like David’s who sought You for each of his needs and praised Your faithfulness. Be glorified in this journey and show me how to give You the honor You deserve. Because of the abundance of Jesus’ provision, I pray, amen.

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