Accepting Limitations

… Thus far you may come and no farther….

Job 38:11

An excerpt from a devotional provided an entirely new perspective on my relationship with a narcissist.

“If you think back to Genesis 1 and 2, you realize that the only being in the entire creation account that is without limits is God himself*.”

The Creation account reveals that God set limits for all He created—all that swam or flew, the times of light and darkness, and the ocean’s boundaries. I also see these limitations in God's response to Job’s question with, “Who shut up the sea behind doors when it burst forth from the womb…when I said, ‘This far you may come and no farther; here is where your proud waves halt?’" (Job 38:8-11).

Because I am also God’s creation, I, too, received limits. Yet, I consistently challenged one constraint each time I attempted to change the heart of my narcissistic spouse. Year after year, I prayed, adapted, counseled, worked on communication skills, and assumed more responsibilities. And yet, striving to accomplish something outside of my control drove me to exhaustion as well as despair.

God limited my life and my love and the ability to influence the behavior of my spouse. Accepting my limitations required humility and honesty, but it also freed me to release the falsely assumed burden for managing someone else’s life. As a result, I am discovering a wellspring of emotional and mental energy for living my own life!

Father, sometimes I feel so slow to learn such simple concepts as limitations. Thank You for guiding me to the realization of my inability to change another person’s heart. Show me how to implement this truth in other areas of my life for Your glory. In the name of Jesus, Your Son, I pray. Amen  

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* Paul Tripp, Everyday Gospel, A Daily Devotional Connecting Scripture to All of Life. (Wheaton, Illinois: Crossway, 2024), 187.