The Peace of God

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.

(John 14:27)

I long for peace—inner peace, family peace, political peace, and global peace. For decades, I lacked peace in my life and in the world around me.

Tragically, my narcissistic relationship stole the most important type of peace; the peace Jesus described to His disciples—the peace of God (Philippians 4:6-7). Even though I possessed peace with God through accepting the gift of salvation through Jesus Christ (Romans 5:1), I had allowed the chaos of a narcissistic relationship to distract me from the peace of God.

Jesus spoke of the peace of God as He prepared his disciples for His departure. Jesus knew the world would pillage their peace during the troubling days ahead.

“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid” (John 14:27).

I felt especially unprepared for the struggle to accept that narcissistic behaviors do not change. This milestone required something called radical acceptance—releasing hope that the narcissist would change, then accepting that reality. The intensity of this mental and emotional struggle tossed me about like the storm the disciples once battled on the Sea of Galilee.

In addition to this battle for acceptance, I discovered that another element also stole my peace—spiritual warfare. Satan did not want me to experience the peace of God.

Mark Bubeck wrote:

“Satan’s attempts to defeat us are seldom more obvious than when he attacks our sense of peace. His strategy is to create chaos within a person. A universal characteristic of those under satanic or demonic attack is turmoil, the disquiet, the torment, the lack of peace they endure*.”

Identifying Satan’s attempts to hijack my peace propelled me to learn more about the role of prayer during spiritual warfare. John Eldredge’s Daily Prayer** soon became my default guide for prayerfully regrouping during times of upheaval and unrest.

I radically accept that my narcissist will not change, and I sense when Satan’s fiery darts disrupt my day. I know to come to God in prayer for His peace as I trust Him for the next day and the next step of this healing journey.   

Father, continue to teach me as I break free from old patterns of stress and experience new realms of peace found in You. May Your Holy Spirit be my guide as I daily seek to incorporate this priceless gift. In Your Son’s name, Jesus, I pray, amen.   

*Mark I. Bubeck, Preparing for Battle, (Chicago: Moody Press, 1999), 223.

**John Eldredge’s Daily Prayer.

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