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When a flood came, the torrent struck that house
but could not shake it, because it was well built.
Luke 6:48
When I read Jesus’ parable of the man who built a house on rock rather than sand, the lilt of a child’s song* comes to mind.
“The wise man built his house upon the rock…
and the rains came tumbling down.
The rains came down and the floods came up…
and the house on the rock stood firm.”
I applied Jesus’ parable to my youthful marriage as we spoke our vows and knelt for the pastor’s blessing. We both claimed Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior. We both committed to serving Him with our marriage.
Yet, the relentless flood of devaluing, discard, and gaslighting from narcissistic abuse struck the house, and it collapsed and its destruction was complete (Luke 6:49).
During the grief and confusion of what appeared to be a failed foundation, I realized Jesus spoke of individual lives, rather than marriages. He distinguished between two types of people: the one “who calls me Lord, Lord and does not do what I say” and the one “who comes to me and hears my words and puts them into practice” (v. 46).
I accepted that I was not capable of putting into practice the words of Jesus for the narcissist. I only possessed the ability to build my life (my house) upon the foundation of obedience to what Jesus taught.
Even though the flood of emotional and psychological abuse collapsed the relationship, my foundation remains strong and secure. My house will survive as I continue to hear God’s words and apply them by faith.
Heavenly Father, thank you that Your words remain true, even when I misunderstand them. Thank You for guiding me to discern and apply Your truths as I release the debris of a narcissistic relationship into Your care. Stabilize my heart and vision for the days ahead. In Your Son’s name I pray, amen.
*The Wise Man and the Foolish Man” by Ann Omley, 1948.
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